Many years ago, I was standing on the southwest corner of Georgia & Burrard, waiting for the light to change so I could cross the street (to the east) towards the Hotel Vancouver. There was a car sitting next to me, on my left, waiting to turn right, onto Burrard.
And while I was standing there waiting, the woman in the passenger seat contemptuously flicked out her still-smoldering cigarette, which landed right next to my foot.
The sheer disregard and selfishness of that action got to me in that instant. I simply reached down and threw it back in the car, helpfully adding, “I think you dropped this.”
Just as I did that, the light turned green, so I proceeded to cross the street, without even looking back. The car was stuck there, waiting for the stream of pedestrians to cross, so it didn’t move. But I did hear her shriek from behind me. I heard the driver screaming at me, too… “Hey!! What the f#@&!!”
The guy blared his horn a few times too, no doubt scaring and upsetting the pedestrians in front of him. I heard more yelling, but, as I said, didn’t turn around so didn’t really see what else may have happened. There was no sudden explosion, so I suppose it all turned out ok.
If that happened today, I’m not sure I’d do the same thing… it seems reckless. On the other hand, the blatant selfish entitlement displayed by that woman deserves some sort of response. “I’m going to smoke right next to you, I’m going to litter right in front of you, I’m going to throw something on fire at your feet… and I couldn’t care less about what you or anyone else thinks.” It’s brutal.
The usual saying is “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you”, but I prefer a slightly different version: “Don’t do unto others as you wouldn’t have them do unto you” – it’s a subtle (but very important) difference… which is that as long as what someone else is doing doesn’t affect you, leave them alone. You don’t want people telling you what to do when it’s none of their business, right? So respectfully… do the same for them. Either way, don’t impose your actions or beliefs on those who aren’t interested.
Which leads us to masks, and let’s set-aside the politically-attached nonsense that goes along with them. This is Canada, and there’s no political party implying that masks are a bad idea. And since around here we actually like listening to what scientists have to say – and they also happen to agree – let’s just go with the generally accepted proven fact that masks are a good idea.
If you are spewing cigarette smoke in my face (not to mention discarding its lit “delivery device” at my feet), let’s agree that it’s an offensive way to disrespect my personal space. Flip it around; even if you smoke, do you want someone blowing smoke in your face?
If that’s not ok, then why would potentially imposing your Covid-19 breath-droplets on someone else be ok? If you’re not wearing a mask while everyone else around you is, think about the message you’re projecting. It’s narcissism at its most fundamental level. Your “so what” and “who cares” attitude normally wouldn’t matter. As per above, if it doesn’t affect me, I don’t care.
Except, of course, in this case… it *does* affect me. Potentially quite drastically, whether me personally, or those around me who may be more vulnerable.
Dr. Bonnie is very gentle in her messaging. Be kind, be calm, etc. But I’m not Dr. Bonnie and I’m not so kind and calm, so I’ll put it in my own words: Don’t be an asshole. Don’t be a self-centered, entitled jerk. Don’t be a disrespectful clown who thinks they’re so awesome, flaunting their individual freedoms… at the expense of everyone else.
Yeah, on second thought… I’d totally throw that cigarette back into the car, onto her lap… if for no other reason than because not doing so empowers her belief that that sort of behaviour is OK. It’s not. It affects everyone around her. Sort of like not wearing a mask.
Well said
The other day we were talking masks and how people don’t get it. A simple way to put it so people understand what you can’t see. Imagine a really cold winter night, you go outside, exhale and see your breath . . . a visual to keep in mind even when it’s warm out. There it is in the air that virus. So 100% agree, wear a mask!
Heh, awesome story. I really despise smokers who are so entitled and offensive about their habit. And it has gotten worse since I now live in a forest that gets tinder dry in the summer.
I wish people understood about how the virus spreads better. That they thought about mask usage rather than blindly following the rules (or doing their best to skirt them). Expecting mask wearing 100% of the time is unrealistic, so understand where it matters and where it doesn’t. Adherence is much more likely if it is less onerous and more intentional.
Great story. This happened to me once too, except the cigarette was flicked at (and burned) my arm.
Took the words right out of my mouth! Wear the ????
Like you say, it really does boil down to “Don’t be an asshole.”
Horatio, I never would have pegged you as a badass. Well done!!! You may just have saved us a forest fire, down the road, as that foolish woman might think twice next time before flicking her lit cigarette out the window. As for masks, I really have to hold myself back when in a store, from angrily asking people “Where is your mask? or “WTF is wrong with you?”
I would so the same thing Horatio ????
Right on the money again. I wish everyone would read this .good on you.
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amen
My question to you Horatio is did you really feel better throwing that cigarette back at her or did you feel more riled up and angry? She got to you and you got her/them back. But what did it actually accomplish?
Just asking because I personally learned something about this from a similar incident. Will tell you sometime!
Personally I haven’t been indoors in a public place without a mask in at least 2 months (unless I’m in the act of eating or drinking and those times are rare). But I wouldn’t lecture others who are mask less because I’m not an ass or an enforcement officer.
I also don’t think anybody would be anti-mask if, from the start, masks were the norm but lockdowns didn’t happen. Overreaching government is to blame for where we are today and this includes Dr Henry who lectures private citizens but then didn’t stand up to her boss’ irresponsible snap election call (IMO).
All. Of.This.
My rights end when they infringe on the rights of others. When someone does not wear a mask in a situation when they cannot safely social distance and especially indoors, then they are infringing on the rights of everyone around them.
I think all the known ‘assholes’ should have their faces dyed blue so we can see them coming.